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Dateless wonder

Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,

I’m a 27-year-old guy, and I’ve never been on a date. I’m sure you get your share of guys like me, so let me be more specific. Now and then when I gather up enough confidence, I try to talk to a girl that strikes my fancy. The problem is that every time we get to what I do, where I live, and what I do for school, they almost instantly lose interest. I work for a large computer company. It’s not very glamorous at all — more like a sweatshop, to be honest — but it pays the bills.

I am close to my associate’s degree, and plan to pursue a bachelor’s degree in computer science. After screwing up back in high school, I’m finally getting on track. Most girls my age have already had their master’s for years. I also live at home with my parents. I don’t really make enough money to pay for school, bills, and my car (and I live a very Spartan life to save money), so I can’t really afford to move until I finish school. I’m a very nice guy with a good sense of humor, I don’t drink or smoke, have no debt (I pay everything in cash), and I am very caring, but this doesn’t seem to be enough. How do I handle this? Should I just wait until I am older and past these issues? Thanks.

— Nothing Going For Me

Dear Nothing,

Perhaps you do not live on the same planet as Dr. Lovemonkey. "Most girls my age have already had their master’s for years." In what country, state (red or blue), or planet is this a fact? The vast majority of men and women do not have advanced degrees.

If you only consider women with master’s degrees appropriate dating material, of course, you’re in for a difficult time. You are excluding large segments of the population, including many people, just like yourself — living at home, busting their ass to get an education, and trying to get ahead by working at a job they do not necessarily like.

Your story has a number of appealing angles — diligence, tenacity, and a will to be successful. Many women would find what you’re doing admirable and impressive, but you are not casting your net wide enough in your search. There are a lot more people out there like you than those with post-graduate degrees, palatial houses, and plenty of dough. And here’s a news flash: some of the more prosperous ones are unhappy, too.

Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,

My 35th high school reunion was a few weeks ago, and I ran into a man who made me feel like thunderstruck when I met him in the 9th grade. Dancing at the reunion made me feel like all those years had just melted away, and I think I’ve lost my true soul mate. I wonder, can we go back and erase all those years we were apart? Should I even think it’s possible?

— Web Witch

Dear Web Witch,

One cannot "erase all those years," but one can start anew. You already have a connection from way back. Undoubtedly, you have both accumulated experiences, both good and bad, that have made you the people you are. Some enhance maturity, some become baggage. You’ll have to get to know each other. One last thing: Dr. Lovemonkey assumes that neither of you is currently committed. Good luck.

Send questions and romantic quandaries to RUDYCHEEKS@prodigy.net