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THE SONG: Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl"
THE LYRIC: "This shit is bananas / B-A-N-A-N-A-S"
THE VERDICT: We don't agree with the readers who suggested this one – we think it's fun in a "guilty pleasures" sort of way – but we're all about the voice of the people here.

060609_killers_main3
RECEIVING MULTIPLE WRITE-INS: "I've got soul but I'm not a soldier"
THE SONG: The Killers, "All These Things I've Done"
THE LYRIC: "I've got soul but I'm not a soldier"
THE VERDICT: That refrain just doesn't make sense. It's even worse when he repeats it ad infinitum.

THE SONG: Crazytown, "Butterfly"
THE LYRIC: "Hey sugar momma, come and dance with me/The smartest thing you ever did was take a chance with me/So, what ever tickles your fancy/Girl it's you like Sid and Nancy"

THE VERDICT: "First, they probably wouldn't know a Sex Pistols' song if Johnny Lydon slapped them in the face. Second, these are truly the worst lyrics of all time. I win,” says reader ariesjenna.

THE SONG: Zager & Evans, "In the Year 2525"
THE LYRIC: "In the year 7510/If God's a-comin', he oughta make it by then/Maybe he'll look around himself and say/Guess it's time for the judgment day."
THE VERDICT: The song is insufferable as it is, but why change the "in the year X" formula for this line? At least stay consistent.  (suggested by doxieman122)

THE SONG: Bloodrock, "DOA"
THE LYRIC: "Life is flowing out my body/Pain is flowing out with my blood/The sheets are red and moist where I'm lying/God in Heaven, teach me how to die"
THE VERDICT: Good times! (also suggested by doxieman 122)

THE SONG: R. Kelly, "Ignition (remix)"
THE LYRIC: "It's the remix to ignition/Hot and fresh out the kitchen/Mama rollin that body got every man in here wishin’/Sippin on coke and rum/I'm like so what I'm drunk/it's the freakin' weekend/Baby I'm about to have me some fun"
THE VERDICT: R. Kelly's lyrics, of course, are bad in the best way possible, like bad in a way that makes you scream at your friends in the car to bring their attention to them, which apparently really happened to our friend, the Waitress, who suggested we add this to our list: "I had been telling my friend Erin about its ridiculous lyrics for weeks. Then one fateful night I was driving her home and flipping through the stations when there it was. I almost deafened her when I screamed, ‘THIS IS IT!!!!!’ We laughed so hard listening to it."

THE SONG: Dan Hartman, "Fletch, Get Out of Town"
THE LYRIC: "Get outta town (get outta town)/Just get outta town/Go north to Alaska, east to Atlantic City, or south to Rio/Almost as far as you can go/Get outta town/Just rent a car (get outta town)/So they won't know where you are"

THE VERDICT: Why not include a possible western destination for poor Fletch? May we suggest Okinawa (depending on his point of origin)? It sings well. It’s as if Anthony Kiedis wrote this. (Suggested by cjb.)

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Related: LeToya, Good vibrations, On the racks: August 15, 2006, More more >
  Topics: Ultimate Lists , Celebrity News, Entertainment, The Black Eyed Peas,  More more >
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53 Comments / Add Comment

Veector

Great list: On Destiny's Child, Bills, Bills, Bills, I love the sarcastic comments :) No, I'm being serious. Really!
Posted: June 14 2006 at 10:46 AM

MM

"Porcupine Pie," by Neil Diamond Porcupine Pie, Porcupine Pie, Porcupine Pie Vanilla Soup, a double scoop please No, maybe I won't, maybe I won't, maybe I will The tutti fruit with fruity blue cheese Ah, but Porcupine Pie, Porcupine Pie, Porcupine Pie Don't let it get on your jeans And though it sounds a little strange Well, you gotta eat it with gloves Or your hands will turn green Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie, It weaves its way through my dreams, And I do believe I'm gonna have one and Leave enough room for dessert, chicken ripple ice cream.
Posted: June 14 2006 at 1:50 PM

FFMand

I can't remember her name, but I will never get these bad lyrics out of my head -and it's not just the words, its the way she has to force the rhyme into the line: "..she's precocious, and she knows just what it takes to.. make a pro blush." (Bette Davis Eyes)
Posted: June 16 2006 at 8:58 AM

djkitt

This one has to get honorable mention: THE SONG: Heaven knows I'm miserable now THE LYRIC: "I was looking for a job, and then I found a job" Ask those down at the Pine Street Inn if it's just that easy Mr. Morrissey.
Posted: June 16 2006 at 7:21 PM

ThingyBlahBlah3

Great list, but it's incomplete without a showing from Alanis Morrisette, the patron saint of awful lyrics. My vote would have been for the "I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner" line from "You Oughta Know," but surely there are many other choices.
Posted: June 22 2006 at 11:37 AM

Rantipole

What?! No "If there a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be a alarmed now. It's just a sprinkling for the may queen."?
Posted: June 24 2006 at 10:53 AM

McMaster

Lest we forget the poet L. Kravitz, "I want to get away.,,, I want to flyyy awayhhh, yeah, yeah. I think he stole this from Lennon/McCartney.
Posted: June 25 2006 at 9:09 PM

Muhammed_Ali

She bangs, she bangs Oh baby when she moves, she moves I go crazy 'cause she Looks like a flower But she stings like a bee Like every girl in history She bangs alright. These lyrics rattle like a tinny jalopy driven too many times. Don't know if it's the echo of Muhammed Ali or the tired 'every rose has it's thorn'/'femme fatale' theme...
Posted: June 27 2006 at 7:44 PM

Muhammed_Ali

She bangs, she bangs Oh baby when she moves, she moves I go crazy 'cause she Looks like a flower But she stings like a bee Like every girl in history She bangs alright. These lyrics rattle like a tinny jalopy driven too many times. Don't know if it's the echo of Muhammed Ali or the tired 'every rose has it's thorn'/'femme fatale' theme that bother me more...
Posted: June 27 2006 at 7:44 PM

bear76@gmail.com

I can not believe that no one entered that Get What You Give song by New Radicals. The song makes me embarrassed to own a radio. And does the band's name count as lyrics?
Posted: June 29 2006 at 11:54 AM
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