Trunk show

Beachwear for the common man

by Frank Habit

For most men, shopping for a bathing suit is like watching Beaches. They do it because somebody (usually female) is making them do it, and they get it over with quickly. After all, who cares what a guy looks like in his trunks?

Answer: women do. A sloppy suit can kill off an otherwise promising beach encounter. We asked Simon Southwood, co-owner and designer of popular LA-based swimwear company Sauvage, how to camouflage a few common male figure flaws with the right swimsuit. His suggestions:

Beer gut or love handles. If your New Year's workout resolution crumbled before Valentine's Day, Southwood suggests a longer, possibly knee-length, variation on boxer shorts; the added fabric helps to "draw the eye away from the tummy." Skip large prints in favor of dark, solid colors, which are visually slimming.

Saggy butt. If your waist is under control but your behind is succumbing to gravity, a square-cut suit (which looks like a fitted boxer short) in Lycra or rubber can provide an appreciable lift. You'll also have the edge of stylishness: Southwood predicts that the metallic finish of many of these fabrics will be the hottest thing at the shore this summer.

Short legs. Was your college nickname Stumpy? Avoid briefs or bikinis, which Southwood says can "cut the body in half" and will underscore your imbalance. Loose-fitting, short-cut boxers with split sides will give you maximum leg exposure. Vertical stripes are a plus: they suggest greater length.

Short torso. To de-emphasize a small upper body, pick out an eye-catching tropical print. Medium-length boxers will help even out your proportions.

Short . . . stuff. If you can't persuade yourself that size doesn't matter, there are suits specially cut to make the most of whatever you've got. Sauvage, which has perfected this kind of trickery, does it in two ways: the "center seam" encourages everything to move forward; the "pouch" is structurally engineered to keep the little soldier at attention. If this is your special problem, you may appreciate Southwood's reassurance that the trend for men in 2000 is away from extremely revealing suits.

Finally, whatever your body type, choose something within your physical and mental comfort zone. A stylish suit that makes you self-conscious will ultimately make you look bad; but the right one can give you the confidence to strike up a conversation with the babe on the next blanket. It may even encourage her to ask you back to her cabana. To watch Beaches.

Retail sources for swimsuits:

City Sports. Manly trunks from Nike, Helly Hansen. 168 Mass Ave, Boston, (617) 236-2222.

Filene's. Wide, if unsurprising, selection of standard styles and colors. 426 Washington Street, Boston, (617) 357-2100.

Urban Outfitters. Fun boxers with Asian, military, and pop-art motifs. 361 Newbury Street, Boston, (617) 236-0088.

Sauvage. Sexy, hip, body-conscious. How tight are your abs? Visit www.sauvagewear.com, or call (858) 514-8229 for a list of Boston-area retailers.