Airy camouflage

by Andy Hiller

HILLER INSTINCT

Wednesday, April 7

Saving Private Clinton: If only American industry could invent anti-gravity combat boots that would let soldiers operate just an inch or two in the air. Then the commander-in-chief could send ground troops to Yugoslavia and insist that he hadn't.

Thursday, April 8

Make that a decaf: Boston City Council president Jim Kelly's fight to protect South Boston from cafés and roof decks may be over before it begins. If the $195,000 asking price listed in the Globe for a two-bedroom condo with a view of "a fire escape and the neighbor's trash cans" is fair market value, Kelly might as well get used to the delights of double lattes.

Friday, April 9

By the numbers: George Stephanopoulos has the nation's number-one nonfiction bestseller, but media critics treat him like number two . . . labeling his book about his years with Bill Clinton a kiss-and-smell betrayal. Just another example of the disconnect between the press and the people.

Saturday, April 10

Sox strategy: (1) Cover up Fenway's charm with billboards and ads; (2) make people hate it; (3) no one will protest if it's torn down. Suggestion: how about a blinking neon Foxy Lady logo behind first base?

Sunday, April 11

Onward, gentrification: If East Boston realtors who want to sustain a "real-estate revival" succeed in stopping Massport's new runway, rents will go up as well as sales prices. And that could split Eastie more than any runway 14/32.

Monday, April 12

POW wow! How can the US demand the release of our three captured soldiers when NATO air strikes are targeting Serbian troops? The only reason we're not taking prisoners of war is that planes can't catch people.

Tuesday, April 13

Slick verdict: A federal judge has written Bill Clinton's legacy: legally and morally, he is contemptible.

WHDH-TV Channel 7 political analyst Andy Hiller can be reached at ahiller@whdh.com. His reflections in a flinty eye appear weekly in the Phoenix.