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R: ARCHIVE, S: MOVIES, D: 02/05/1998,

Deep Rising

Another pleasure-ship disaster flick -- they had no choice but to hype this one with the phrase "And you thought the passengers of the Titanic had problems . . . " But a shady, self-serving ship owner, a band of torpedo-wielding terrorists (most of them foreign, of course), a sexy woman jewel thief, and a number of gigantic, super-intelligent bloodthirsty sea monsters can't match the villainy of a good old-fashioned iceberg. Neither can they stop Deep Rising's hero, Finnegan (Treat Williams), a bland version of Han Solo with his own piece-of-junk vessel and an all too goofy sidekick (Kevin J. O'Connor) who talks exactly like Shaggy from Scooby Doo. All the humans, in fact, plus a subplot about how the ship owner, Canton (Anthony Heald), is trying to pull an insurance scam, just weigh down credible performances from some genuinely spooky and disgusting monsters. And in case you thought Hollywood was running out of ideas: these monsters don't eat humans -- they drink them, leaving far too many blood-stained skeletons lying on deck. At the Cheri, the Fresh Pond, and the Circle and in the suburbs.

-- Mark Bazer