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R: ARCHIVE, S: MOVIES, D: 10/21/1999,

Get Bruce!

If you've ever endured the tired humor of the fourth hour of an Oscars broadcast hosted by Whoopi Goldberg, you probably have wanted to get Bruce too. Bruce Vilanch, the hirsute and roly-poly ("Jim Henson just had his fist up my ass," he once retorted to Donny Osmond when the latter compared him to a Muppet) comedy writer responsible for some of the highs and lows of the past decade of Academy Awards shows (from Billy Crystal's Jack Palance routine to the infamous Rob Lowe/Snow White production), nonetheless deserves better than this glib and sloppy documentary by Andrew J. Kuehn. Cobbled together mostly from interviews with Vilanch's clients (Bette Midler, Robin Williams, Crystal), the film degenerates into a showcase of their egos rather than an exploration of a little-known aspect of the entertainment industry and a profile of one of its more colorful proponents. The few glimpses into Vilanch's background and personal life -- openly gay and an AIDS activist, he has a revealingly tense moment with Steven Seagal -- suggest there might be a genuine story behind the smarm and self-promotion. Someone should get Bruce to tell it.

-- Peter Keough