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THE LOST SKELETON OF CADAVRA

Sometimes it’s not such a fine line between stupid and clever. Sometimes it’s just one long slog through undifferentiated inanity. That’s unfair: I remember at least one funny line in Larry Blamire’s belabored, black-and-white, B-movie spoof. It was, "But seriously, we’ll clean the dishes before we go." And one line that was all too painfully apt: "It’s horrible, horrible! I can’t watch anymore!"

But watch I did, and this parody of sci-fi standards ranging from those beyond parody — Ed Wood’s Plan 9 from Outer Space — to those above it — Jacques Tourneur’s Cat People — and everything in between never rises above the level of the sophomoric, strained and tedious. It’s kind of like Mystery Science Theater 3000, except the feature and the snide audience are one. Blamire himself stars as Dr. Armstrong, a "meteorographer" in search of a space object rich in "atmospherium," a powerful element also sought by a Conehead-like alien couple and by the skeleton of the title. Oh, and there’s a mutant in a cheesy costume! How kitschy those old films were, and how silly their dialogue! Do yourself a favor and rent one of them instead of watching this time waster. (90 minutes)


Issue Date: February 13 - 19, 2004
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