E-Mail This Article to a Friend Stand up and be counted (continued)

Jim Murray's picks

1. Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater (PlayStation 2)

Hopefully, some of you read my review of this work of art last month and went out and bought it. Judging by the sales records, though, that most likely didn’t happen. Rather than once again gushing over everything that makes this the greatest game on the PS2 – and maybe of all time – I’ll put it to you differently. If MGS3 were a television show, it’d be on par with The Wire or The Office. If it were a motion picture from this year, it’d be on par with Sideways or Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. If it were a rock band, its peers would be the Beatles or Nirvana. See where I’m going?

It’s a shame that the masses have instead chosen crap like Goldeneye: Rogue Agent, Fear Factor, National Treasure, and Ashlee Simpson, instead of real brilliance. Don’t be a sheep. If you even remotely respect yourself as a gamer or as someone who can truly appreciate genius, then get Metal Gear Solid 3 NOW!

2. Ninja Gaiden (Xbox)

Many gamers bitched about how difficult it was and never finished it. Or worse, never bothered to play it at all. That’s a shame, because Tecmo’s "Team Ninja" put together the best-looking game on the Xbox, and more importantly, the best straight-up action game I’ve ever played. It was the perfect blend of top-notch visuals and old-skool, 8-bit-style gaming. Sure, the camera sucked, but as of a few months ago you were able to download a patch that cured it. Regardless, this is an incredible game and it would have been my number-one pick if not for MGS3.

3. Final Fantasy XI (PlayStation 2)

The game that finally broke me of a personal promise. That promise? That I’d never play massively multiplayer online role-playing games. FFXI is deeper than the Atlantic Ocean, has endless amounts of playtime, and will take over your life. I logged almost 300 hours on this game from March to September. Yeah, I know that’s sort of sad, but the game is that good. It’s also so good that I’ll never play it, or another MMORPG, again. Think of it as video-game heroin. Beware.

4. Katamari Damacy (PlayStation 2)

Got a girlfriend who hates your video games? Pop this in, hand her a Dual Shock and watch her become a zombie. It’s quirky, it’s got an amazing soundtrack, it’s incredibly fun, and it’s less than 20 bucks. Hell, it’s so good that even that rag Entertainment Weekly has been singing its praises in the past couple of issues. Bitches, I told you about it months ago!

5. Halo 2 (Xbox)

Yeah, the hype was ridiculous. And yeah, I’ll hand it to Mitch in regards to his review from a month or so back. The single-player campaign is very…"Eh." However, the online and LAN play of Halo 2 is where it’s at, and I can’t get enough of it. It’s so good, in fact, that I’ve consistently blown off real-life social settings with my friends so I could play online with a bunch of strangers. Sad, really, when you think about it. Regardless, it’s a hell of a game.

The "Boy, This Really Sucks" Award for 2004

This wasn’t easy, as there were a ton of downright awful and over-commercialized games this year. (Hello, all of those Vietnam games, both James Bond games, and sexed-up garbage like Rumble Roses.) I’m hoping you were smart enough to avoid all of that trash. No, this award is going to a game that I had ridiculously high hopes for and was ultimately crushed with disappointment in. Gamers, the "Boy, This Really Sucks" Award goes to…

Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes (GameCube). In retrospect, I shouldn't have been surprised by this game sucking. I’ve been patiently waiting for someone, anyone, to release an A++ title for Nintendo’s junk-box – oops, I mean, Gamecube – for nearly four years. It’s just never going to happen. This bastardized version of Metal Gear Solid has amazing graphics, but that’s where anything good about this game ends.

The assclowns at Silicon Knights took Hideo Kojima’s masterpiece and made it way too easy (for today’s lazy gamer); replaced many of the voice actors with bored-sounding substitutes (Mei-Ling no longer sounds "cute"? Blasphemy!); screwed with an already incredible story by adding unnecessary cutscenes; forced you to play with the worst controller in the history of videogames, the Gamecube controller; and perhaps worst of all, butchered the greatest soundtrack in the history of videogames by using new music.

I’ve said it plenty of times now: I’m a straight-up Metal Gear fanboy. That’s why this was my "Boy, This Really Sucks" Award winner. I’d like to think this game doesn’t even exist. All I can compare it to are the new-and-improved versions of the original Star Wars movies. Yeah, okay, George Lucas, Greedo shoots first. Dick. That never happened. You know it, and I know it. And Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes never happened, either.