When I was growing up in the hinterlands of Central New York, grade-school kids would commonly remark, "That sucks." Translated, that meant, "That stinks," or "That’s too bad." Conversely, if someone boasted about some good fortune happening to him or her, and you responded with, "You suck," that, for the most part, meant "You’re lucky," or "You are soooooo undeservedly fortunate."

Fast-forward to 2002, where you can buy T-shirts, placards, key chains, evening wear, and probably even condoms emblazoned with the lowbrow Sox fan’s credo, YANKEES SUCK. We can talk about Curses of Bambinos, we can talk about destiny and aura appearing nightly, we can talk about dynasties, we can talk about 1918, and we can even talk about 26 World Series championships. But, relating back to the definition from my youth of the verb "suck," does the New York Yankees baseball club deserve this mean-spirited characterization? Are they lucky and undeservedly fortunate? Or — to adopt those crude terms that flutter continually throughout the Fenway bleachers — do the Yankees really "suck"?

Loyal readers of this column most certainly have picked up on the fact that I am a follower of the hometown Red Sox, and while all baseball fans took their own roads to the team to which they ultimately became devoted, mine is probably as roundabout as anyone’s.

I was born and raised in a small town in upstate New York, where hardball fans were and are evenly divided into two camps: Mets fans and Yankees fans. Never the twain shall meet, and no one in his or her right mind is a fan of both teams. You are one, or the other, and let the fisticuffs begin.

I grew up as a devotee of the expansion Mets, who started playing in the National League in 1962 and were horrible during their first seven years of existence. Given the narrow choice of teams to root for — the long-established pinstripers, or the new kids on the block from Queens — choosing the Mets was not the most logical proposition, but it stemmed from the fact that my father hated the Yankees, and, therefore, I learned to hate the Yankees. I gathered that my father didn’t begrudge the Yankees their success, but instead despised their unforgivable sin of having biased radio and TV announcers, or "homers." My dad constantly berated long-time Yankee voice Mel Allen, and later Phil Rizzuto, for constantly heaping praise on the team when they did well, and ignoring their foibles and making up inane excuses for them when things didn’t go their way.

Little did I know then about the Johnny Mosts and Tommy Heinsohns of the world; in my little corner of New York, humble pie was the flavor of the month, and announcers were supposed to provide just the facts, ma’am, not openly root for the team whose actions they were describing. So I became a fan of the cross-town Mets, and my allegiance was almost immediately rewarded with their improbable World Series title in 1969.

I did not become a Red Sox fan until 1978, when, because the Yankees were involved in a one-game playoff to determine the AL East championship, I naturally had to root for New York’s opponent. I think you can surmise the foe that day, and probably recall the outcome.

We all know how the teams’ fortunes have taken different paths since then, with New York taking world titles in ’78, ’81, ’96, ’98, ’99, and ’00, in addition to their 1977 championship. The Sox have appeared in just one Fall Classic since Bucky Dent Day, and they watched the New Yorkers win a total of 26 trophies since Babe Ruth was traded in 1920.

So, getting back to the original question: are the Yankees lucky, are the Red Sox unlucky, are is it a lot more complicated than that?

I began to think about this as I drove back to central New York this past weekend. As my car’s radio signal (and the Sox’ efforts against Seattle) from Fenway Park began to fade, I was forced to listen to the Yankee radio network broadcast the Bronx Bombers’ home game against Minnesota, partly to get a final score from Boston, and also to root telepathically against the Yankees. The Yanks in that Friday-night game had blown an 8-3 lead and trailed the Twins by 9-8 heading into the bottom of the ninth. But as soon as I heard color man John Sterling announce that Derek Jeter, Bernie Williams, and Jason Giambi would be up that inning, I knew the Twins’ lead was toast. I knew. Any Yankee hater would have known, because that’s the way we know things to be. And sure enough, Williams hit a towering blast to left and tied the game. It is high, it is deep, it ... is ... gone!

By the time the game moved on to extra innings, I was perched in front of a TV, waiting for the inevitable. Surprisingly, after four scoreless extra frames, Minnesota scored three runs off Sterling Hitchcock and led, 12-9, heading into the bottom of the 14th. Safe lead, right? Go home, Yankees fans! It’s nearly 1 a.m. and your team’s down by three! Nighty-night! The Yankees will lose. Right ...

Well, if you’re a Sox fan, you probably know where this is heading, too. Sure enough, the Yankees loaded the bases, and Giambi, New York’s latest big-money free-agent acquisition, then launched a grand slam into the right-field bleachers to give the Bombers a 13-12 win. What could one say, other than "typical"?

So get to it, man, are the Yankees lucky? Well, as long as I can remember, it seems like the New Yorkers have certainly caught some breaks. The list is indeed quite lengthy. In the decades since Ruth went south, but before free agency, 14 players played the bulks of their careers for New York and then reached Cooperstown. For the Sox, there are three. Thirteen pinstripers have had their numbers retired by the team, in addition to manager Casey Stengel, while the Sox had retired just five (Joe Cronin, Bobby Doerr, Ted, Yaz, and Pudge), and none of them ever wore a World Series ring. The Sox have advanced to the World Series just four times since 1918, and lost each one in the seventh game, usually with some drama, subplot, and heartbreak attached. The Yankees have lost more times in the Series (11) than the Sox have even reached the postseason since 1918. From 1920 through 1966, the Sox won one AL pennant; New York won 20 championships.

But is New York lucky? The four seventh-game World Series losses certainly label the Sox as unlucky, and on top of that, until 1995 there were only two postseason one-game playoffs in baseball history; Boston was in ’em both, and lost ’em both. In ’67, the Sox lost Tony Conigliaro, a player who could have helped complete the Impossible Dream season with a win over the Cardinals, to an eye injury. In ’75, rookie phenom Jim Rice was hit in the hand with a pitch in September, forcing him to miss the World Series against the Reds. In ’86, a rejuvenated Tom Seaver went down with an arm injury in the weeks leading up to the playoffs, and did not participate in the flame-out against the Mets. And then there’s Roger Clemens’s game-six blister ...

The Yankees have always had the most money to spend, mainly because they can sell their radio and TV rights for so much cash that it more than covers the $100 million–plus team payroll. As a result, they can afford free-agent pick-ups like Reggie Jackson, Mike Mussina, and Giambi, and cultivate their farm system so that it produces gems like Jeter, Williams, Mariano Rivera, and hundreds of others (and consequently be able to afford to ink them for the long term). Boston’s farm system in recent years has given us Nomar and Shea Hillenbrand.

New York’s history boasts superstars Lou Gehrig, Babe Ruth, Joe DiMaggio, Yogi Berra, Whitey Ford, Roger Maris, and Mickey Mantle, to name just a few; the Sox during that era counted only Ted and Yaz among their stars. Sparky Lyle stunk in Boston, but was traded and won an MVP in the Bronx. Twelve-year-old Jeffrey Mayer gloves a "home run" ball that had been hit into the Yankees Stadium bleachers during the 1996 AL playoffs, changing history and helping vault the Yanks into the Series, and instead of being vilified and ejected from the premises, he is in the front row with George Steinbrenner the next night, viewed as a hero by Yankee fans everywhere. And later? Championship number 23.

And let’s not even get into the bad calls that went against the Sox in the ’99 ALCS versus New York, including Chuck Knoblauch-head’s phantom tag on Jose Offerman. Any of these, had they been ruled correctly, could have turned the tide in the Sox’ favor.

Look, I don’t want to sound like some long-suffering, whiny Red Sox fan. There are enough of them out there, and that’s why Sox devotees are labeled as the biggest crybabies in all of sports. After all, you don’t hear such ranting and raving from the even-longer-suffering fans of the Indians, Cubs, or White Sox

We’re just here to answer the basic question: are the Yankees lucky, or do they deserve their good fortune? Are the Red Sox unlucky, or do they deserve their misfortune?

Yankees at Red Sox for four this weekend. You make the call.

Sporting Eye runs Mondays and Fridays at BostonPhoenix.com. Christopher Young can be reached at cyoung[a]phx.com