E-Mail This Article to a Friend RODNEY DANGERFIELD (1921-2004) The story of his life COMPILED BY ROGER JONES

I get no respect, I’m telling you, no respect.

My doctor said, "We did our best," but I pulled through.

Had a job in a pet store, people kept asking how big I’d get, okay?

Had a dog, his favorite bone was in my arm, y’know? No respect at all.

My wife made me alphabet soup. It spelled "help."

And I don’t think toast should have bones in it, okay?

The steak still had marks where the jockey was hitting it ...

Haven’t talked to my wife in years ... I didn’t want to interrupt her.

Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it, okay?

Now I got nothing to look forward to except getting very sick and dying.