E-Mail This Article to a Friend THE REAL WORLD AUDITIONS Puck? You? BY SETH REISS

On Saturday, October 1, MTV will hold open auditions for the next Real World at The Rack on Clinton Street. If you are between the ages of 18 and 24, and brave enough to be followed around by cameras — leading every goober with a chip on his shoulder to try to pick a fight with you at a bar, here are some dos and don’ts for your interview.

• Don’t act like you are a Real World historian. Example: "Your ascot reminds me of Real World Los Angeles when David pulled off Tammy’s towel. Tammy, as you may or may not know, went on to marry to NBA guard Kenny Anderson."

• Do have a strong sense of self, especially if your "self" is black or gay. If you are white, be sure to talk about your black friend. If you’ve never had a black friend, make one up. As long as you are making one up, make him gay too.

• Don’t answer your cell phone if it rings during the audition. Instead, glance at the caller ID and casually say, "It’s The Amazing Race calling."

• Do talk with a Boston accent, even if you don’t have one. People in LA "love that shit."

• Don’t pretend that you are a janitor at MIT who grew up in Southie but can do incredibly complex math problems.

• And don’t say you go to Harvard. People in LA find that threatening. If you do go to Harvard, transfer to Northeastern before the audition.

• Don’t ask if you can have "carte blanche" on the types of fish in the tank. In fact, don’t ask if you can have "carte blanche" on anything ... ever.

• Do answer "yes" to the question: "Are you comfortable with your nakedness?"

The Real World auditions will be held October 1, 10 am to 5 pm, at The Rack, 24 Clinton Street, Boston. Bring photo ID.