Iran’s blogosfear

Ahmadinejad-mania  
By ADAM REILLY & BILL JENSEN  |  August 17, 2006

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is blogging! That’s right, kids — Iran’s smilin’, Holocaust-denyin’, nuclear-power-wantin’, windbreaker-wearin’ president joined the new media this week, over at ahmadinejad.ir. Maybe it’s just the site’s Farsi-English translation, but the first post seemed a bit rough: Mahmoud droned on endlessly about his impoverished childhood, how much the Shah sucked, how great Khomeini was, etcetera, and let’s just say his prose was not fluid. (But the poll was solid: “Do you think the United States and Israel are pulling the trigger for another world war? Vote ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ ”)

Don’t count Mahmoud out yet, though, because in the “blogosphere,” you’re only as bad — or good! — as your last post. Thanks to some sloppy pre-posting over at ahmadinejad.ir, the Phoenix has gotten a look at what’s on tap for the next few weeks. The average lifespan of a blog is six months. As you can see, Mahmoud clearly plans on sticking it out longer.

August 18, 2006 So, yesterday was my wife’s birthday, and you could say it didn’t go well. I searched Tehran’s finest shops and finally got her a fancy new chador: black, nice craftsmanship, well tailored (if you catch my drift). Anyway, she pulls the chador out of the box, takes one look at it, and immediately starts whining: “Mahmoud, this is a gift for you, not for me!” I got upset and went out for a walk; when I got back, she’d already gone to bed. Of course, by then I realized she was probably right.

August 21, 2006 Do you think Samuel L. Jackson’s intention with Snakes on a Plane was to make a horror movie and it just wound up being funny? Vote “yes” or “no.”

September 7, 2006 We’ve got THA BOMB! That’s right, and it totally works, so the Americans and the Zionists should probably be quaking in their boots right about now. (Except Mike Wallace, because a) he says he’s not part of the Zionist conspiracy, and b) we actually had a pretty good interview.)

Random thought of the day: if Jews really invented pastrami, how come it tastes so darn good? :-)

September 29, 2006 Many people seem to be coming to my site via a Google search for “Lindsay Lohan” and “breasts.” I would just like to say that those two subjects are in two separate posts. The first was my comparison of Herbie: Fully Loaded (which I just got from Netflix) with the earlier “Herbie” films. The other was a post on the KFC in Kermanshah.

October 4, 2006 Sometimes I think the basiji need to take it down a notch. For example, the other day my wife left something in the car, and she ducked out to grab it wearing my windbreaker instead of her chador. (Un-Islamic, true, but the car was like five feet away from the house.) She’s out for one minute — two, tops — and along come two hopped-up teenage basiji, shaggy beards and all, yelling about how she’s a Zionist harlot. If I hadn’t stuck my head out the window and told them to chill out, who knows? But even though it totally sucked, I have to say, their expressions when they realized they were messing with the president’s wife? Hilarious.;-)

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